Saturday, January 01, 2005

The Infernal Web of Soul Conduits

So as it turns out, Network Admin Fangirl is not actually someone with a geek fetish. The truth is far more disturbing...

You see, Aetherfox is moving into an apartment with her. However when it seemed like he might be unable to stay for the semester, her family, oddly and disturbingly enough, seemed to think he was now somehow responsible for her. Aetherfox suddenly realised that he had entered into a bargain of the most diabolic kind.
For the truth is that Network Admin Fangirl is a soul vampire, secretly forming soul-conduits with her victims and leeching their L33t Sk1llz from them in the dead of the night! However her conduits are distance dependent- they require you to be nearby in order to work properly. This is why she wanted to move in with him!
He also cursed his hastiness in dropping his Introduction to Demonology Systems subject- though arguably the fact that he was of a technological persuasion would have rendered his magick somewhat useless. He would have to enlist the help of that famous witch of his acquaintance, the dreaded Oracle!
It came to him then that the signs had been all too clear. First his colleague Nathy had fallen prey to her charms. However he was too pale to withstand her leeching for long. Hingon however was immune- he was so pale that he had obviously been leeched past the point of further leeching by Athena- Athena was not nearly as dark when she entered college! And then of course there was Full Sexual Intercourse, Nathy's flatmate, who also was as pale as sin. Was it possible that he too had been leeched?
He wondered what direction this Infernal Web of Soul Conduits, this iwsc:// if you will would take next. Perhaps even if he was to escape, someone such as Sexy Black French Guy would take his place.

The poor bastard.


Aubrey said...

(insert eerie sound here) I am sending you a message.....from the past Yes, I know, that's different from every other post/comment how?

There exists a direct correlation between darkness of ones skin and the amount of soul they possess? Why didn't I think of it before? Here in Anchorage, where everyone is evil, everyone is also very, very pale. I thought it was the lack of sunlight, but this makes much more sense.

So, from now on, if something bad is going to happen in the future (since you'll obviously know about it first, living in the future and all) give me a heads up. 'Cause I live in the last time zone, and also the USA (double trouble), so therefore I am at an obvious disadvantage when it comes to being accurately informed.

xD.Vesper said...

this is just LOL !!! i totally didn't expect you to post our conversation hehe.

queerlittleprincess said...

Wow your life is so much more dramatic than mine! Oh go and look at my new photos!

David said...

So I was talking to Network Admin Fangirl the other night, and she said that she hates guys because they are emotionally weak. so therefore as a result she hates me.

I wonder how I can work this to the full extent of my advantage, apart from just using it to avoid her :)

(evil laughter)

Snipergirl said...

Oh man, I can't believe it's almost been 2 weeks since I've had a computer (the old home one died and we're getting the new one on Saturday)! So I'm posting from the library. Oh, and guess what, we can't access webmail from here :-P.

One day I shall post the tale of Extentua, Princess of Gloom, which complements the tale of the Infernal Web of Soul Conduits rather well...

Aubrey: It's true, Alaskans and Australians ARE evil!

Vesper: Thought you'd like it ;-). Hope your exorcism goes ok. I am on hand with my lightbulb blowing powers at a ready if you need them...!

QLP: I'm on my way to check them out now!

David: Didn't realise you were so scared of soul-sucking vampyres... oh wait, that sort of makes sense.