Saturday, December 18, 2004

Melbourne >> Sydney

Here I am, bored in Sydney. Therefore I will write to you all about how much better Melbourne is than Sydney (as you probably guessed from the very mathematical expression that comprises the subject of this message).
For one thing, I am living at home. This wouldn't be so back except for the fact that we live FIFTEEN FRICKIN' KILOMETRES from the GODDAMN CITY.
Next, Sydney has the shittest cafes ever. Plus the coffee sucks. And the names of the cafes are terrible too. Cafe Andronicus? Please, who would want to go to a cafe which sounds like it is inhabited by only "Macho, Macho Men" unless you want to be a member of the Village People.
Also, the city centre is populated by a species of individuals renowned worldwide for their cluelessness and stupidity. That's right, tourists. I challenge anyone in Sydney to ask a random for directions. Because sure as hell you're not gonna get any. Why not? Because there ARE no Sydneysiders in the city. They're all 15 kms from the city drinking terribly weak flat whites.
Then of course there is the nightlife. When your nightlife consists of crappy nightclubs populated by members of the stripey shirt brigade or terrible tourist pubs, well... one would rather drink at home to be honest.
And dare I mention the public transport...?

5 comments:

Aubrey said...

hurrah Melbourne!

the bruise you got at the Essendon-Doggies match? that was me mothafucka!

Snipergirl said...

There's a reason I don't follow AFL, and this is it.

David said...

AFL is only good when Geelong win, or it's a choice of that or cricket/american rules football. Soccer/ Rugby Union/Tennis are much better games.

Sydney is a crap hole. That's why my dad moved away from it.

Anonymous said...

i think you should seriously consider coming back to melbourne earlier than planned, so you have a chance to party and relax before uni starts again.
love raunchy librarian.

Snipergirl said...

I'll be back on the 3rd of Feb so will be at Q+A that Thursday (yay!) and since my classes don't start till the 7th and uni proper doesn't till the start of March I'll have some time to chiiiiilll, lahk a dawg.