Sunday, July 25, 2004

Clones and Fairy Robots

So, for the past couple of nights, me and Tynic et al. have been doing a bit of ye olde bar hopping, in both the city and Fitzroy. During our wanderings, we've noticed a couple of new species of bar denizens. That's right, the Clones and the Fairy Robots.

We stood in the Deanery next to a table which was apparently empty, but for the coats of its so-called occupiers, who stood casually talking, in ostentatious defiance of our obvious desire to sit at the table. Eventually we did however- soon after, the previous occupants decided to take their apparel and leave. And then we did see the Clones. Three or four women, strikingly alike in countenance somehow, and yet not all that alike at all. We could not fathom the reason for their similarity- they were not identical, and yet they seemed frighteningly similar, in the way that married couples grow to resemble each other. Their haircuts, their style of apparel, their general facial structure appeared to correlate to a large degree, and yet, that still did not seem to explain their freakish resemblance.
Such bizarre occurrences were forgot until the following night, when we sat in a bar adorned with the posters of Communist Chinese propaganda films. We made way for a group of women leaving the bar. They paused and then... their resemblance to the clones of the previous night was apparent. In fact we were convinced that these were the very women who had so weirded us out earlier. However, it was hard to say whether these were the original clones so to speak, or clones of clones. We left with no firm opinion on these strange events.

Fairy Robots:
At Café Nova, a girl sat with shiny "robot boots" on. She also had a tiara and was wearing that style of clothing which screams "I am a cute girl", which sort of went with her vacuous expression quite well. We imagined that her outfit would be complete with the addition of some fairy wings. And thus the legend of the fairy robots was born.
The Black Pearl also sported its very own fairy robot. She had her own robot shoes, her clothing was that lacy kind of op-shop clothing and she wore huge fake pearls which in my opinion were her equivalent of a tiara. These "pearls" were more accurately described as small lustrous balls, and the fake oysters which spawned them would probably be the size of small children.

These events have reinforced what I've known about Melbourne for quite sometime- that it is a place filled with complete weirdos.

SG out

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